Wingnut Evangelicals Think Mel Is A-Okay!

Well, the batshit-crazy sector has finally been heard from. You’ve got to figure they’ve been sitting around for the past few weeks thinking, “Sure, we hate the Jews as much as Mel, but we try not to say it out loud. We try to be more... subtle than that. You know, just implying that they’re agents of the Devil, wink, wink, nudge, nudge. But now we’ve got to respond to this. How embarrassing.” And then they spent weeks trying to devise a way that they could still agree with Mel (or “Melvin Gibstein,” as Penn Jillette suggests we dub him from here on out), without... you know, “agreeing” with him.

“Oh, Passion isn’t antisemitic at all. No, it’s just the way the Bible said... What do you mean, it’s not actually the way the Bible said? Nonsense! This is how I remember it, with all the kik... I mean, jews conspiring to kill our Lord and Savior! We’re all open and tolerant, you know, but come on... they are guilty here. Let’s not forget that.

“Oh, and I’m sure Mel didn’t mean any of it. It was the alcohol talking...”

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